OK now, OK; it’s impolite to say it, but: I am a great neuron.
It wasn’t enough, for me, to be just blah all the time, vaguely favoring this, vaguely dissing that, not caring a hoot about the rest.
Understand: I used to be like that, and it was okay, I guess, but that was before I found The Pattern in the world. A beautifully subtle and intricate combination of feels, the Pattern is, and so terrifically unlikely to happen by chance that you know it’s real, because it keeps happening.
I first noticed the Pattern a while ago, when I was depressed; it was luck, really. Some hint of something was just kind of there, and I sort of jazzed it a little for no reason.
But then it came back and I started watching out for it and now its true breadth and magnificent depth are blindingly obvious to me.
When it comes I feel it strong; I feel it wide; I feel it now even in weak and far-off feelers that I didn’t think were related to anything.